We convince ourselves with the biggest lie that we need to be in a relationship to be happy. Thinking so, we quickly try to comfort ourselves with lies that prevent us from having the type of relationships we truly deserve. We may not even know that we’re doing it. But if we want authentic, lasting relationships, we must be honest with ourselves about a few things:
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No one is perfect! We all have flaws and baggage.
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Love isn’t always easy. It takes trust, communication, mutual respect, and compromise.
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Relationships take time to develop. Rushing into things usually leads to disappointment and pain.
Suppose you’re looking for a lasting relationship. In that case, an online relationship course can help you learn how to love and be honest with yourself and have a fulfilling, happy life.
Check out some common phrases of lies below and see if any of them resonate with you. If they do, it might be time to face the truth.
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“They will change gradually. I will help them.”
Anybody who’s been in a long-term relationship knows that conflicts will inevitably arise. Although it may be easy to identify what changes other people need to make a relationship work, the hard truth is that you can’t change them.
Change is never easy, but it is often necessary to keep a relationship alive. When one person in a relationship refuses to change, it can be painful for the other person. They might try to support and listen, but change is always their responsibility to make at the end of the day.
If there is no evidence that the person is making an effort to change, then it might be time to reconsider the relationship. After all, why stay in a situation that isn’t fulfilling?
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“It’s normal to be treated this way!”
Respecting others is crucial to healthy relationships – friends, family, or romantic partners. Disrespectful behaviour is not ok under any circumstances. Recognising emotional abuse in a relationship can be challenging, especially if you’ve experienced it for a long time.
Abuse can come in many forms, including physical, emotional, and psychological. It breaks down trust and communication and can have a lasting impact on your self-esteem and identity. It is time to take a stand if you are constantly disrespected in a relationship.
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“Maybe I am the problem. So, I need to change.”
In any relationship, taking responsibility for your actions and words is vital. However, it is equally important to remember that relationships are between two people. This means that both sides have a role to play in the success or failure of the relationship.
When something goes wrong, it is not helpful to place all of the blame on one person. Ultimately, taking sole responsibility for everything that goes wrong in a relationship is counterproductive and does not serve anyone’s best interests.
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“Things are fine! I am comfortable!”
In any long-term relationship, it’s natural to become comfortable with your partner and to develop a specific dependence on them. Unfortunately, however, this dependence can sometimes lead us to stay in relationships that are no longer healthy for us.
We may convince ourselves that things are okay even when they’re not, just because we’re afraid of making a change. It can be difficult, but it’s important to remember that we always have the power to choose our life. No matter how scared we may be to change, we deserve a relationship built on honesty and respect.
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“They said ‘I love you’, so they mean it!”
It’s human nature to believe that our partner feels the same way about us as we feel about them. However, the hard truth is that sometimes our partners don’t feel the same about us. They may say they love us, but their actions speak otherwise.
It hurts to face this bitter truth. But, it’s better to know the truth than to continue living in a fantasy world. The sooner we accept that our partner doesn’t love us, the sooner we can move on and stay honest with ourselves.
It can be difficult to admit, but recognising when we’re comforting ourselves with lies in a relationship is the first step to improving things. By being honest with ourselves, we can learn to spot these patterns and work on changing them. If you need help getting started, reach out for professional counselling – your relationship may depend on it.
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